Wanderlust is f*cking hilarious. For those of you that, like me, live under a rock and don't have a TV (no seriously, I don't) here's the trailer:
It is exactly my type of humor. The guy who did Role Models is responsible for this ridiculous movie and I freaking loved it. Maybe it was because I have weird hippie tendencies that tend to surface from time to time, maybe it's because I make fun of myself and other hippies, maybe it's because I actually know people who are as ridiculous as the people in the commune that they go live in. Either way, you should go see it. I laughed like a hyena the entire time. I have a cackle. It's gross. It scares people. I don't like Jennifer Aniston though. Sorry bout it. She annoys me and I think she looks like a mouse. Team Angelina all the way. Her character even pissed me off. But it's ok. It was still good.
I went out Saturday night. It was funny. I can't drink beer anymore and I don't like hard liquor or spirits because they wreak havoc on my stomach, but I don't like asking for a glass of red wine at a college bar like a pretentious asshole. Solution? I drink wine out of a plastic cup. Then switch to water. I'm such a party animal. No but really, it was fun. I can make a fool out of myself even while I'm sober. Best part is I'm able to drive home and snuggle up with Elle when the night has run its course.
Guess what todayyyy marks the start of! My 4th week of CrossFit. Guess what that means? By the end of this week I'm going to post a progress picture. Yikes. I don't weigh myself because I hate judging myself by a number so I don't know if I lose weight. I like to judge by how I feel and how I think I look, which of course isn't always the best standard to hold yourself to because you're your worst critic. But I'm hypothesizing that although I'm losing fattyness, I'm gaining muscle, so the scale would lie to me anyway. I've been living by this BroTip recently and I've been trying to work on my pull-ups. I hate pull-ups. Can't do one. Never really worked on them before when I was a gym-rat. But I'm determined to get there now. I scaled a lot on today's WOD and although I finished 7 rounds well under the time limit (10x 8# wall balls @ 10ft, 10x pull-ups, green band assisted) I felt as though I could have made it a lot rougher on myself. But we were told to scale scale scale if need be for this workout, so I did. But it's good because I'm gaining more confidence that I'll be able to not scale as much the next time. I could have done the rx 14# wall ball because the 8# was not challenging enough, so I'm going to do that next time. 
Look at those short, stubby legs of mine. I think I have cankles. Maybe my soleus is just abnormally long/wide. That's a muscle of your calf if ya didn't know. I love the calf muscles, they're so cool sounding. Gastrocnemius = cool. Tensor digitorum longus = cool. That's the one I always remembered for some reason. (Photo Courtesy of CrossFit Blacksburg) Speaking of anatomical features, tonight we have the first repro practical! The past couple of weeks we've been teaching male anatomy and tonight at 7 and 9pm, students will get a chance to show us what they've got. Or don't have. Either one. It's going to be a late night. Usually we don't get done grading until around midnight. That's super late for me. Elle gets to come though. Which is cool. Puppy party! One of the grad TA's has a little cutie mix named Lily and the other has a gorgeous greyhound named Dr. Pepper. I call him DoctorP. I've been making a comic-series on the inner-workings of the male reproductive system. It's absolutely ridiculous. I clearly have too much time on my hands. The male system works like a manufacturing plant though and so I'm leading people on a "tour" through the plant. It's called "Scrotal Bro's Manufacturing Corporation" the plant manager is Mr. Pee Body, a urea molecule that "works" in the bladder. The CEO and board members are up on Hypo-Pituitary Street (supposed to be Wall Street) in BrainHattan. And the comic features a variety of other characters like Mr. Leydig, who has a problem consuming too much LH at times and vomits (think of me and almond butter), and Mr. Sertoli who is a hippie and does yoga in the seminiferous tubules and complains about no corporate regulation, but still accepts handouts of FSH from the head honchos. He's a hypocrite. Doesn't this make you want to read the comic?? It's f*cking awesome. And informative. I'm a huge active-visual learner, which means I learn by drawing and diagramming things. Bonus points if the sh*t I'm drawing is funny. Luckily, that's not too hard when you're dealing with reproductive physiology. You laugh whenever I say penis. Don't lie.
Today we're going to look at a few recipes for my favorite meal: breakfast. I live for breakfast. It comes with eggs - yum - hot sauce - double yum - and other really cool things like pepper! K that's only 3 things. But guess what, you can make breakfast fun! I'm usually lazy and fry up a couple eggs and some egg whites, but when I'm feeling ambitious I like to make Hellish Eggs. Originally modified from a recipe called "Eggs in Purgatory" from some website I don't remember, Hellish Eggs kick a$$. They're spicy, fiery, and poached in a devilish tomato sauce. Without further ado...
Hellish Eggs:
Enough sauce/space for about 4 eggs
- 2 tablespoons Olive Oil
- 1 small white onion, chopped (course or fine depending on your onion preferences - for example, Mark will not eat onions if he can feel their texture, so he'd go the finely chopped route, weirdo)
- 3 garlic cloves, minced - or more, obviously
- 1 tsp crushed red pepper - depending on how spicy you like things this may be too much or too little, as always, I guesstimate with spices
- 1 tsp course ground pepper
- 1 can (14.5 oz) fire roasted, no salt added diced tomatoes
- 4 large eggs
- Fresh basil leaves, for garnish
1. Heat olive oil over medium heat in a skillet and add chopped onions. Saute until somewhat translucent, about 5-8 minutes.
2. Add garlic, crushed red pepper and coarse ground pepper and sauté about a minute longer, or until the garlic is fragrant.
3. Stir in the diced tomatoes with their juices and bring to a steady boil, reduce to a simmer and let it sit for about 5 minutes. You can wait longer if you want the tomato sauce to thicken a lot, but it's not necessary for the flavor/consistency.
4. Bring the heat back up to medium and use the back of a wooden spoon to make little pockets in the tomato sauce for the eggs. Crack an egg into each slot (and don't worry if the slots are not super obvious, they weren't at all for me and it worked) and then cover the skillet.
5. For runny yolks - cook, covered around 6 minutes. For set yolks, 3-4 minutes longer. Use your finger to push down on them every minute or so to get desired yolk-hardness. I'm so technical with all my timings/vocabulary.
6. Use a spatula without slots and serve the eggs with equal tomato sauce. Garnish with basil leaves and more pepper if you'd like.
A note about these: don't forget to cover!!! I did the first time I made these and it took about 20 minutes for me to realize that my eggs weren't gettin' hard. Stooopid ET. This breakfast is the bomb though. I'm borderline obsessed with it and it's really easy to make too. I often scale it back and use half a can for 2-3 eggs. You can also store excess Hellish Eggs in the fridge and eat them cold for lunch. If your yolks are hard they kinda taste like hardboiled eggs. With spicy tomato sauce under them.
Another take on breakfast that's super easy also includes tomato, basil, and my favorite: PINE NUTS.
It's essentially a caprese egg white omelette.
Caprese Egg White Omelette:
All you need are:
Egg whites (about 1/2 a cup) - pour 'em in a pan sprayed with olive oil on medium heat and let them turn a little opaque.
Tomato slices - stick em on top of the egg whites.
Basil - shred it, stick flutter (new verb) the pieces around the tomatoes in the egg whites.
Pine Nuts - crushed into little chunks, fluttered evenly around the tomatoes.
Coarse Ground Pepper - sprinkled on top of everything
Garlic Powder - ditto to the above step.
Let the eggs set a bit, and this is where it get's tricky. You're going to have to flip to the other side. I recommend using lower heat than usual, letting the eggs set - a lot - and then either flipping with a wrist jerk or a big spatula (or 2). Get creative. Don't worry if you fail. I do all the time.
I garnish with - you guessed it - more pine nuts. But you can do more basil as well!
I don't know why I just remembered this and why I feel compelled to tell you but I painted one hand of nails yesterday. Just the left side because I'm not skilled enough to do the right. I must have looked ridiculous today. Who paints only ONE side of their nails? This girl.
The above photo is my advice to you for today.
Also, check out this article on the toxicity of sugar sent to me by my Padre, to whom I owe credit for actually being somewhat decent on the rower.
TTFN - ta ta for now!
I'm making these hellish eggs tonight, cousin. (why does that sound hillbilly?) Anyway, if they don't turn out right, don't worry- I'll blame your dad.
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