Ground Sloth 2.0 - Coriander Beef Burgers

I'm baaaack! Did you miss me? Probably not. But let me tell you, you missed my food. Sike. Let's recap the past few months. 

Fondly known in my little head as the "Summer of Cheese", I let myself diverge from the paleo path a lot this summer. Gluten? Hell to the no. Dairy? Um. Yup. Fro-yo, cheese, more cheese, more fro-yo, more cheese. My body shows it. I've got a love tire buildin' around my haunches. I nicknamed her Michelin. I don't love her. It's time for us to go our separate ways.

I did not cook AT ALL this summer. Why? Well I have some exciting news that may seem to have absolutely nothing to do with cooking, but it's a very important detail in our upcoming culinary journey together: I MOVED TO SCOTLAND! WHAT?! I know. More on that later. When you move abroad, you tend to need money. When you move to a city, you definitely need money. So it went that in order to make money to travel, I needed to work. And work I did. I worked my little booty off all summer long. Basically, I did nothing but crossfit and work. You look shocked. Of course I continued crossfit. Every. Damn. Day. Well, 5 out of 7 days. Sometimes more, sometimes less. I never dipped below 4 times a week though. Proud. With my summer eating habits it was necessary for me to continue burpee-ing and squatting. If I hadn't, I'd be obese. True story. 

That brings me to CrossFit Reston. I can't say enough good things about this gym. Coaches: awesome, inspiring, challenging, pushed me to new levels I never knew possible. I'm obsessed. I miss them. I miss my Blacksburg family too. If it hadn't been for the coaches in Blacksburg, I'd have had terrible form, a lack of confidence - which is not only bad for the mind, but dangerous for the body as well! - and an inability to look at the WOD and say, "Ok. I'm going to need to scale myself down today."

And not that you can see it but in the above picture I pay homage to Crossfit Blacksburg on my bulletin board. A postcard mailed to me by Jesse when I first started up! That, my friends, is the famous new Ground Sloth 2.0 blogging area. Still in progress. As an aside, I had to get rid of a couch in order to fit a clothes rack. Clothes > comfort. Priorities people. Those are mine. Along with food. And sleep. And red wine. 

I FINALLY found Tyrrell's parsnip chips at my new favorite food store Real Foods. It's like Whole Foods but smaller. And awesome. Why? Because they have Tyrrell's. And a competent staff. And Raw Cacao and Cinnamon KALE CHIPS. They have cashews in them. And over the summer I swore off nuts because I kept getting really bloated when I ate them. But these nuggets are soaked first, which helps. And I wasn't going to pass them up.

The farmer's market here is ridiculous, by the way. I get amazing local meat and produce from farmers in the area who care about things like sustainability and welfare and making food that tastes good. The vegetables I purchased literally were dug up from the ground and brought over to the market. So. Cool. Best part is? It's every Saturday, year round, right down the street from me. Yipee!!!

Now, tonight I had my very first cooking experience in my new flat. Aaaaand I almost burnt the house down. RIP Magic Bullet. You were the cats pajamas. Sadly, you did not come with a converter. Almost starting an electrical fire is a SURE way to make friends. Idiot american, that's what I am. Fiasco numero 2: my microwave requires rocket science to operate. I had my meat 90% thawed. Thought I'd pop it in the micro just to get that last 10% down because my tummy was a rumblin. Select: defrost meat. Put in 0.3 lbs (because obviously that's 10% of 1 lb). Hit start. 2 minutes later - ding. Meat comes out lookin' all sorts of weirdly cooked around the edges. Fail. These burgers were still awesome. And if you're not a dumb dumb, they'll probably be even more so. 

Coriander Beef Burgers

Topped with Pork-Venison Salami and Caramelized Onions

Makes - 4 quarter pound burgers 

• 1 lb. Local Ground Beef
• 1 Pastured Egg
• 1/4 cup chopped Fresh Coriander (Cilantro)
• 2 tsp Cayenne Pepper
• 1 tsp Ground Coriander
• 1 tsp dried Onion Flakes
• 1/2 tsp Cumin
• 1/2 tsp Garlic Powder
• 1/2 tsp Coarse Ground Black Pepper
• 1/2 tsp Coarse Sea Salt

Directions - 

1. In a large mixing bowl combine all the above ingredients. 

    Mix well and let chill for about an hour in the fridge or form 

    4 even patties. 

2. Heat stove or grill and grease with a little coconut oil. 

3. Cook patties for about 5 minutes each side. 

4. Serve hot topped with pork-venison salami (if you can find 

    it you're one lucky person!!!), caramelized onions, and avocado. 

                           

For the caramelized onions I took this onion above, cut it in half, mandolin-ed it (dangerous with the previous luck I was having), and sauteed it in the pan after the burgers had cooked with a tablespoon of coconut oil until they were golden.